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The Effortless Woman and The Principles That She Lives By

Have you ever met a woman and admired how graceful she was? The way she dressed, spoke and just seemed to be so at ease no matter what? I call this, the effortless woman. She can be found at the gym, a high-end boutique or even at a Starbucks having a Frappuccino. The truth is that the effortless woman is all around us. Some of you may have grown up observing this type of woman in an aunty, mentor or celebrity.

If you're anything like me, there might have even been times that you wished you could be a fly on the wall, to observe what her morning routine is or which makeup products she uses to achieve that flawless winged liner. The problem is, these types of women are often very discreet and getting to know their "trade secrets", can prove difficult if you're looking from the outside in.

I recently had the opportunity to interview Sarah and in that interview, she shared her personal definition of what it means to be effortless. Since then, I've found myself thinking about what it means to embody effortlessness, ease and grace. What does it actually mean to be an effortless woman? What are the characteristics of an effortless woman? In this post, I'll be sharing what I think the answers to all of these questions are. My hope is that as you read, you will think about the areas of your life that could flow, a little more effortlessly.

// She prioritises her emotional wellbeing and happiness //

I've witnessed first-hand how the effortless woman remains determined to put herself first. This means setting healthy boundaries and ensuring that those boundaries are not crossed, even in her closest relationships. Prioritising wellbeing and happiness also requires that you don't put yourself in positions that could compromise your mental clarity i.e. excessive alcohol consumption. The harsh reality is that people will only take you as seriously as you take yourself. If you treat yourself well, people will follow suit.


// She takes pride in her appearance //

The effortless woman is more than just her looks alone, but looks do play a part. We all know when someone has had to rush into work after missing the alarm, not just because they arrive late but because their appearance shows it. Their hair might still be damp from jumping in the shower or even worse, they might have mismatched socks!

Similarly, we all know a well-groomed woman when we see one. Her nails are always manicured, her hair glossy and healthy, her makeup flawless, her teeth white and bright and she always smells good! Even with all of these things going for her, she's always looking for ways to upgrade. For example, you might be using a good Maybelline foundation but want to upgrade to an Estee Lauder foundation but you're unsure of what your shade would be? Tools like findation will help you discover your perfect match. It's all about these small incremental changes that have you looking and feeling better in the long term.

Your appearance is your first chance to put your best foot forward in any social situation. Capitalise on this!


// She nurtures her relationships //

Having a healthy support system is priceless and the effortless woman knows this. She makes time for the people that she loves the most, no matter how busy her schedule gets. She is always someone that her friends and family can count on.


One great resource for nurturing the close relationships in your life is to explore the 5 love languages. Created by the author, Gary Chapman, the 5 love languages help you to explore the ways in which you feel the most loved, as well as the ways that your nearest and dearest feel most loved. For example, by taking the test you may discover that your significant other feels most loved through words of affirmation and that you feel most loved through acts of service. Armed with this knowledge, you can now cater to each other's emotional needs more accurately.

No matter how you choose to nurture your relationships, it's important to recognise the value of the people in your life.

The last 12 months has proved invaluable in teaching us the importance of having a strong circle. It's important that even as the pandemic gradually fades away, that we don't take these lessons for granted.


// Her faith and spiritual beliefs are her guiding light //

Faith and spirituality are unique concepts to each and every person and it's such a beautiful part of life that we're given the freedom to explore. My faith as a Christian has helped me to live a more effortless life as I put my trust in God rather than the things around me.

One thing is for sure, the effortless woman has a guiding light in her life, which acts as a source of peace and moral compass. In difficult situations her faith is her anchor. Engaging in prayer and meditation, through apps like Headspace are all a part of this process. Her faith also allows her to live in accordance with the golden key of life, which is to treat others as you would like to be treated. In this way, she is able to express kindness both to others and to herself.


// Mystery is her middle name //

Through my observations, I've found that this point is important but often easily ignored. The truth is that the effortless woman exercises self-control and discretion. Her life isn't readily available for the world and she is intentional about who she shares personal information with. She isn't perfect, but over the years she's mastered the art of knowing who to share what with.

Mystery isn't mystical. It's about self-preservation and knowing that parts of your life aren't a secret, they're simply not everyone else's business.

The effortless woman knows this and she isn't afraid to tell other people when they're asking for more than they should. She is also respectful of other people's privacy, in return.


// She is open-minded and curious about the world //

Whether it's reading a book based in a distant land or travelling there instead, the effortless woman is well-informed about curious about the world around her. She's clued up on current affairs and is cultured. She also prides herself on her desire to grow and improve and can be found indulging in self-development techniques to improve the quality of her life. She is at ease being around people from different walks of life and cultural backgrounds. She is adaptable.


Take action!

Effortlessness can be embodied in so many different ways. These are just a few of the principles that the effortless woman lives by. For more inspiration, create a vision board filled with images of women that inspire you to live with ease and grace!

Written by Faith O.

Contributing writer for Effortlessly Sarah


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